the effect of divorce

The Effect of Divorce on Family Life

 

Dostoevsky said, “With love one can live even without happiness.” So if we find a person who loves each other, we often choose to get married with the partner. It maybe look like a wonderful. But Michel De Montaigne also said “Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside equally desperate to get out” So some couple sometimes want to get out from marriage. As a result, they divorce. According to a survey from Japanese Ministry of Health, Labour and Welfare (2009), about 251000 couples divorced in 2008. In international marriage case, the ratio of divorce is higher than normal marriage. I think that there are some reasons. For example, If you marriage foreign partner, it will be harder and more difficult for you to communicate with the partner, because of difference of language. Other reason is difference of culture. For example, Japanese people are usually shy and they do not usually tell ‘I love you’ to their partner. But some foreigner can not understand this thing. Then, some international couple often make a misunderstanding. In the worst case, they fight, bawl and hit each other. Finally, they will decide to divorce.

And what is the main reasons about divorce? First, it may be an inconsistent of character. So, couple share their times in private time. But if they do not feel comfortable in their sharing time, they often feel stressful and seductive. Therefore, it is important for couples to feel comfortable to keep their good relationship. Second, I think that relations with the opposite sex is another reason. That to say that, couples spend not only their partner but also their friends or workmates in daily life. It is a normal thing. But some people often get jealous when their partner talk with opposite sex. I think that it is not bad. However, some people doubt partner’s cheating, when they find that partner chat with other people or talk with the opposite sex. Third, some people beat partner, because of stress, rude character and drunk. If partner is rude, it is difficult for couples to keep the relationship. Fourth, some couples do not have enough knowledge to run family life, because they got married when they were too young like a 17 or 18 years old.  In other word, child gets marry to child. In this case, if they get pregnant and give birth, it is not easy for them to provide their babies, because they do not become self-reliant in economically and socially. Especially, there are many people who got married too early in developing countries. In addition to that, almost all them suffer from poverty.

And what is the effect of divorce? I think that if they have children, there are substantial effect to their children. For example, their children may be overcome with apprehensions, because they often see fierce argument of parents. Furthermore, some children do not have a good record in school, because they can not concentrate on studying and one parent does not have enough time to pay attention to children. Therefore, they will not work in good jobs in their future too. In addition to that, they can not get married with good partner, because they did not have a good experience of marriage when they were children. In parents case, some parents who divorced from partner often feel stressful and melancholy, because they do not meet their children many times after divorcing. If they live with children or live near place, they can meet in weekend or vacation. However in international divorce, it is very hard for one parent to meet his/her children, because some children went back to another parent’s home country.

In my conclusion, they are many bad effects of divorce in both parents and children. What should we prevent from these bad effects? I think that we have to think seriously about marriage. And if they decide to divorce, they need to have enough time to spend their children after divorcing.